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I fake that I’m asleep until I know that Bruno’s asleep for sure. I just lay there in the dark and let my thoughts eat me up. My mind is being pulled in a million different directions and I can’t make it stop. I get tired of just laying there so I go downstairs to the kitchen and make myself a drink. Lily must have left to Ari’s because when I look out of the window her car isn’t there. I sure could use her company right about now-I feel like I need to vent. I think of what to do next and decide that a bath might calm me down and help me relax enough so that I can try to sleep. I tiptoe back into the room and go into the bathroom shutting the door quietly behind me. I run the bath water and put in lavender scented bubbles. I light a few candles and put my drink on the edge of the tub. I undress and slowly sink in to the hot water. I close my eyes and lean my head back and try to think of something that made me happy recently in hopes that they can outshine these stupid thoughts and nasty feelings and what comes to mind is Valentine’s Day. From there my head goes to the fellas performing and I’m at square one again. I shake my head like if it was an etch-a-sketch and the shaking motion will erase it. I don’t know what to think of so I open my eyes and look around. I remember that there’s a book by the sink that I left in here the last time I bathed. I sit up and lean out of the tub to get it. It’s some sci-fi horror book and it’s just what I needed. I soak and read until the water gets cold. When I get out I’m all wrinkly and cold so I get dressed quickly. I’m hoping that those stupid feelings left my body through reverse osmosis into the water. I let out a yawn and climb back into bed with my boo. He stirs a little and I hope I don’t wake him up but I hear him whisper my name. “Yea” I whisper back. “I love you" "I love you too boo" "I don’t want you to feel sad or bad or whatever it is that you’re feeling”. I ignore that and just lay there. He falls asleep quickly again and I turn so that I’m facing him. I move in close and rest my head on his shoulder. His skin is so warm and I can still smell his cologne on his skin even though he’s only in his boxers. I place a kiss on his neck and close my eyes again in a futile attempt to get some rest. Somehow he wakes up again, which is rare, and does exactly what I needed. He runs his fingers up and down my arm and hums and it puts me to sleep finally. I swear one of these days I will make him record his humming and put it on my iPod. When I wake up again he’s not next to me neither is Dragon-I don’t like it and it makes me feel anxious. I sit up and try to listen for him and feel relieved when I hear him downstairs. I get up and brush my teeth then head downstairs where I find him in the kitchen trying to cook something but from the looks of it, he’s struggling. “Boo, what are you doing?” He looks up at me and the look on his face is adorable. It’s a combination of defeat, oh shit and help me please. “I wanted to make you breakfast in bed but I suck at it" why does he make my heart skip a beat? I walk up to him and spin him away from the counter. I wrap my arms around his waist and rest my head on his chest. I squeeze him as tight as I can and he kisses the top of my head "I’m sorry I made a mess and still have no breakfast ready to offer you" he says genuinely "boo, I’ll help you. We can fix this, easy!" He gives me the pouty faced look and my heart melts. He really did try to make scrambled eggs, pancakes and Bacon. Well at least that’s my guess from everything I see on my counter. We tag team the prep and clean up and he tells me that he has an idea "you go upstairs and pretend to be asleep still, I’ll put this on a plate and bring you breakfast in bed”. I don’t say a word but pick up Dragon and head to my room. I crawl under the blankets and realize that I could stay in bed all day if he let me. I close my eyes when I hear him climbing up the stairs a few minutes later. When he walks in Dragon runs from one side of the bed to the other excited about the prospect of getting food. Bruno sets the tray on my nightstand and bends down to kiss my cheek “baby, wake up….I made you breakfast" I play difficult and keep my eyes closed "La…I’m naked" he says and my eyes shoot open. I forget about the food and jump up wrapping my arms around his neck. My eyes scan down his body quickly and I pout "you lied" he giggles a little "I knew that would work, you freak" "takes one to know one…now you owe me" "whatever my Lala wants, she gets”. He climbs into bed with me and grabs the tray “boo, this looks delicious …you did a good job” I say as I steal a kiss. He smiles and that alone makes my day a billion times brighter. “Anything for my baby”. We stuff our faces until there’s nothing left on our plates. Dragon even got lucky because his dad snuck him some bacon. Bruno puts the tray back on the nightstand and lays back rubbing his stomach. I lay my head on his chest “can we have a lazy day? Because today I don’t feel like doing anything. I just wanna lay in my bed. I don’t even want to pick up the phone” he smiles at me “is that what you want? To do nothing at all?" I nod my head yes "I’ll do you though, you’re my only exception". He smirks and I want to stick my finger in his dimple.
We do exactly that. We lay in bed, watch TV, get lost in each other, have great conversations then go back to the television until about 6 at night when Phil starts calling “Where the hell are you guys?” I hear him on the other end. “La kept me as her sex slave all day” Bruno jokes and I can hear the disgust in Phil’s voice “c’mon bro…you could’ve told me something else”. Bruno tells him that we’ll be there after we shower and get dressed so we hop to it. I throw on some basketball shorts and a tee with my sneakers and my hair pulled up into a bun. Bruno puts on some of his sweats and a tee and some flip flops. I have to take that boy for a pedicure one of these days! I grab his little fatty as we walk down the stairs and he stops and looks at me “Laila, we have to get to the lab. Stop before I have to take your ass back into that room” shoot, don’t threaten me with a good time! So, I do it again. “Phil is going to kill you” he laughs. “I know, I know” I say as we walk out of the door with our pup. When we get to the studio all of the fellas are there without their girls so I know that it’s all business today. “It’s about damn time” Eric says as we walk in. “I held him captive today guys, blame me” I joke “Gross” Ryan says. He’s leaving a few days and that genuinely makes me sad. I give everyone a hug and a kiss except for Ryan who I slap box with. I get him good real quick on his stomach and he gives me the evil eye. “So I think we should talk about last night” Phil says. WHYYYYYY???? Automatically my stomach sinks into my feet and the joy I had today went out the window. I put on my brave girl face though and listen to what they have to say. “I think we went in there strong and put on a good ass show” Eric says. They all shake their head yes so I go along and do the same. “Everyone sang the hell out of the songs and left their heart on the stage” Brody adds. I nod my head to this too because it’s the safest thing to do. “Yea the music was tight and the vocals were on point” Mr. Perfectionist aka Bruno says. “From my standpoint, it was the best you guys ever sounded. You guys killed it” Ari says and again I’m nodding. “What about you La?” Phil asks and I freeze “uh…uh…it was good” I say as I shake my head wishing they would shake theirs too. “Just good?” Ryan asks and I shoot him the evil eye. “You guys were phenomenal. The label people seemed to love you” I add. Bruno gives me that look. They keep talking and I excuse myself and head down to the kitchen. I let out a huge sigh and look in their liquor cabinet. Crown Royal, why not? I pour myself a shot and down it then make myself a drink. I don’t know why I think this will help me feel better but I just go with it. I come back up after a few minutes with the biggest cup they own filled with crown and iced tea. “What you got there sis?” Eric asks. “Iced tea and crown”. Bruno shoots me a look but fuck it. “What did I miss?” I act as if I really want to hear what they were saying while I was gone. “Nothing really, we should be hearing something soon” Phil answers. I take a big gulp of my drink and Ryan comes and put his arm around my shoulder “easy there woman…it’s going to be okay”. I sure hope he’s right.
Dragon is wrestling with Ari so I take Ari’s typical seat behind the sound board. I browse through the tracks that are saved and find a random beat and decide to play it. I sit there and head bob for a while as I sip and out of nowhere start freestyling about my drink.” I have the guys laughing in no time. “La you are in rare form right now” Bruno says and he’s absolutely right. I’m not even drunk, that’s the weird part. Soon enough Phil is in on the action and when I look back Ryan is coming up the lab stairs with his arms full of bottles and Eric is behind him with cups, iced tea and soda. We spend the night in the lab drinking and being fools but actually getting some work done. At the end of the night I feel better but that could be because of the liquid in my cup. Bruno is sitting at the keyboard and I go and sit next to him laying my head on his shoulder “you okay babe?””Yea I’m good…just thinking that you owe me” leave it to me to get tipsy and have my hormones go into overdrive on him. He gives me that smirk then bites his lip. “In a little bit baby, be patient” ugh did he really just say that? Eventually everyone picks a spot and crashes and I head down to Bruno’s room. I make it a point to strip down in front of him when he comes in and closes the door. Yup, why not sleep in the nude while you’re tipsy and your hormones are raging. It doesn’t take him long to pay up.
The next few weeks go by quickly and we haven’t heard a thing. In a way it helps ease my nerves but the guys are on edge about it. Working and shopping have been keeping my mind occupied too. Easter is around the corner and I am making baskets for my godson, niece, nephew and Bruno’s nephews. Tahiti is preggo now so I plan on making a basket for her lil one on the way. I have been keeping in contact with his family in Hawaii and with Ryan too since he returned back to the island. Taking him to the airport a few weeks ago sucked and I cried inside because I felt like I was sending one of my brothers away. He promised to come back soon though. I’ve been skyping with mami and the kids a lot lately and I miss them like crazy. Whenever I can afford another vacation, I know where I’m going. Other than that, things have been normal and calm around the lab and at home. The gigs are growing in attendance and it feels nice. Lily and Ari are like two freaking teenagers in love, it’s sickening and cute all at once but I’m happy for them and I’m glad they have each other. Urbana and Phil are doing well and surprisingly Eric has been talking to some lady friend who he is feeling. I’m trying to convince him to double, triple or quadruple date but he says that he doesn’t want us to scare her away. I have to meet the chick and question her eventually. It’s the sisterly thing to do and I promised his sisters that I would do it anyways.
I’m at home laying with Bruno one night watching Wayne’s World when his phone goes off. He answers it and I can hear Phil on the other end but I can barely make out what he’s saying. Soon enough Bruno’s shoots up out of bed and starts pacing around the room. I sit there confused with Dragon but asking him what the hell is going on is not going to get me far right now. I see him pump his fist into the air and do a little spin. Seeing him this excited makes me a little nervous and anxious. He does a lot of “uh huh, uh huh” and “mmmm, wow” until he finally hangs up. When he does he rushes to the edge of the bed and kisses me hard. What the hell was that about? “Oh my God Lala they want to have a meeting with us”. I know who he is talking about but I act dumb “who and when?” “The label…they set up a meeting with us in two weeks.” I literally feel like I could throw up. I know my face went pale by the way he looked at me. He’s so excited and here I am about to throw up, what the hell is my problem? “Baby you don’t look too good. Are you ok?” I shake my head yes and no and pray that this nauseous feeling passes. “Do you want something to drink?” he asks and I shake my head yes. The minute he goes downstairs I can’t help but run to the bathroom and throw up. Why does my head to this to me? My nerves got the best of me and that feeling in the pit of my stomach is back. I flush the toilet, spray some air freshener and try to brush my teeth before Bruno gets back upstairs but I didn’t move fast enough. “Laila, are you ok?” I hear him outside of the bathroom door. I don’t answer and he walks in to find me sitting on the floor with tears running down my face. He rushes over and lifts me up sitting me on his lap as he sits on the toilet seat. “You have to tell me what’s going on. I hate seeing you pretend like everything is ok and nothing is bothering you when I know that something is going on in that pretty little head of yours. Start talking” I take a deep breath and lay my head on his shoulder. I feel dumb but I spill my guts to him, well whatever is left that I didn’t puke up. “Ever since I learned about the gig I got this feeling in the pit of my stomach that something wasn’t right. I mentioned it to you before” he nods his head yes that he remembers “well, every time I’ve gotten that feeling in the past, something goes wrong. It never fails. I’m just scared and the feeling won’t go away. I don’t know what it’s going to be but something will happen or not happen that is just going to not be right. It has nothing to do with you guys, it’s all on me” He holds me a little tighter “baby, it’s going to be alright. You are phenomenal and if they don’t see what we see than they are blind. I promise you that you’ll be ok, we’ll be ok. I promise” I want to believe him. It does feel good to tell him about how long it’s been bothering me. He leads me back to the bed and helps me climb in. He climbs in right next to me and holds me close until I fall asleep. My dreams that night are horrible.